Ashton Rumours

A 'journalist' at The People has told close friends that the paper is a soiled wank-mag written for sad old men too scared to buy real porn.

The same journalist yesterday claimed Ashton had told close friends he would leave West Ham if relegated. Coincidently, whilst we are on the subject of sad readers of wank-mags, it is now being reported that Sp#rs will bid for the striker in the summer.