Cottee Exists in the Realm of Wurzel Gummidge

The Sun says that Mathew Etherington is in talks with West Ham over a new contract, ”I’m in talks over a new contract but maybe there was a time when I didn’t think I’d get one,” Etherington said.

The Daily Mail say Alan Curbishley is jealous that Harry Redknapp's side has not been struck by injuries, “Unlike me, he's been able to put out the same side every week so they've all been able to slot in. I haven't been able to do that.”

The Mirror continue on the same theme saying West Ham are jealous of Pompey's start, "They had a real tricky start on paper, the top four teams, and got through that. They have had a fantastic run and can it continue? He finds himself in the top six. A terrific start," said Curbishley.

In The Guardian Russell Brand compares Tony Cottee to Wurzel Gummidge, "Cottee is a hero of mine, occupying a place in my affections so formative that it is almost impossible to view him objectively. He exists in a realm shared by childhood pets, Wurzel Gummidge and Morrissey."